Happy Birthday Lauren

Today Lauren is 23. Wow. I was 23 when I had her. Crazy. Crazy to think that 23 years have gone by so fast. And this last year has been a real doozy. Here's wishing my daughter a very happy day and a better year this year.

All that being said and out of the way, we did get some good news yesterday. After a series of circumstances that had us questioning the blood clot diagnosis, we contacted Lauren's doctor at USC who set us up for an appointment with an internist at USC yesterday afternoon. We picked up all her records, scans, etc. from the hospital she was in last week and headed down to USC. The doctor carefully went over all of her records and scans and did not believe there was a clot. He sent her down for another ultrasound and it was confirmed. NO CLOT. That means no coumadin. Yay! That coumadin is a very serious drug and we are all relieved to know that she does not need it. A good and competent doctor is invaluable. Lesson learned. The hard way.

Tomorrow we are going home to the HG for the holiday weekend. I am beyond excited to see my friends and family. The entire weekend has been carefully planned out including a birthday celebration for Lauren on Friday night. And my entire family is going to Debbie's for Turkey day. It isn't often that the whole Ubriaco clan is together. Even Bob and his clan will be in attendance, except for Allison. Getting to see all my beautiful nieces (minus Allison) is a definite bonus. Chicago here we come!

One Very Long Road

There was a bit of a setback this week. After a trip to the emergency room and another hospital stay, only 3 days, we learned that Lauren has developed a blood clot in her right calf. While this is very serious and a side effect we thought we were long past, we are glad to have discovered it when we did. With an impending flight home to Chicago for Thanksgiving, things could have gone quite differently. Risk factors for blood clots include recent surgeries, open fractures, recent air travel, immobility and birth control pills. All of which pertain to Lauren. Even her nurse in Chicago was shocked that this would occur so long after surgery. The result is a regiment of Lovanox (an injected anticoagulant drug) and coumadin (an oral anticoagulant) for at least 3 months. Coumadin is a very serious drug. The simplest kitchen accident can cause a coumadin patient to bleed to death. Honestly? How much more must she endure? And us as worried parents? I am certain that this is my penance for all the unscrupulous things I have done in my life. I only wish my daughter did not have to suffer for my indiscretions. Rick, Lauren and I all understand this could have been worse. She could have had a head injury or a spinal cord injury. And I always try to look at the glass as being half full, but enough already. When will the screams from across the lake stop haunting me? And when will my daughter walk again?

I May Have Scared Him

Today, as Lauren and I were leaving physical therapy, there in the courtyard of the plaza walking toward us, was Bruce Jenner! Lauren and I quickly looked at each other and said, "BRUCE?!" Sure enough. When we were moving to Calabasas I told Rick that him and Bruce should hook up. I seriously think they could hang. As you can see I wore my best outfit. After all, I was just zipping in to pick up Lauren then back home to pay bills, etc. If I had known I'd run into Bruce I may have opted to actually wash my hair rather than toss on my trusty Bears hat. And jacket. It is game day though. Right away we approached Bruce and asked for a photo. He was very nice and after Lauren took this one of me, I took one of Bruce and her. He even told Lauren that he would come over to her so she didn't have to crutch. I told him I was a fan long before the Kardashian show, way back from his Olympic days. He jokingly replied, "Oh, you're old enough to remember that?" Oh yeah. I certainly remember him on the Wheaties box, which probably meant all my brothers wanted to be him. I can be a little loud and aggressive, just a little, and I think at first he was a bit hesitant. Could I be some psycho stalker? And if you notice in the picture his fists are clenched. Well, not clenched, but definitely not open. Now I'm not a behavioral analyst but I think that speaks volumes. There you have it. My first celebrity sighting just a mile from our humble little apartment. No doubt there will be more but when? Where? And will I be wearing something cute? Odds are even on that one.

Unexpected Item in Bagging Area

Please remove item.

We have all used the self check outs at our grocery store. I actually prefer them because I think I can do it faster and more efficiently. I know, I think that about everything. But seriously. You're checking out, everything is going smoothly and quickly, when you get the dreaded warning, "Unexpected item in bagging area. Please remove item." When you remove the item the warning does not clear from the screen and after waiting five minutes, the attending cashier is looking at you like you're some kind of idiot while she casually makes her way over to your machine to clear the warning. My question is: Is it really that unexpected? You are buying groceries, you scan your milk and BAM, there's the warning. Is it so unexpected to put your milk in the bagging area? Where the fuck should I put it? I'd like to shove it right down Mr. Jewel/Osco/Albertsons/Sav-On's throat. And while I'm on the subject, the coupons that print out after your purchase are completely worthless. You may get a "Save $10 on your next purchase of $120 or more. Expires in 4 seconds. Or it could be "Save 50 cents on your next purchase of Jif peanut butter" in the save a third world nation size. For Pete's sake, save a tree and quit printing out all those worthless coupons. And hire a computer programmer who does not think that putting your milk in the bagging area is so off the chart!

That's my rant for the day.

Happy Birthday to the Big Guy

That's right. It's official. I am now married to the Medicare man. Freaky. It seems like just yesterday we were celebrating Rick's 60th birthday at the racetrack. Where did 5 years go? Today we will celebrate but everyday I celebrate my good fortune for having found him. He is the only thing that keeps me semi-grounded in this crazy world. So, to the love of my life, may this be your best birthday yet and may you have enough birthdays left to "piss on my grave!"

I'm in Love, I'm All Shook Up!

That's right. Henry was Elvis for Halloween. So damn cute. He could be my teddy bear any time. And I must give equal time to the equally adorable Audrey who was supposed to be Strawberry Shortcake but changed her mind at the last minute (like every woman) and was a butterfly instead. Spending time with Audrey and Henry has been the biggest perk of wintering in SoCal. Here's why.

I knew that Audrey and Henry's babysitter had taken them somewhere to see some chickens. For whatever reason I thought they were in someone's backyard.

Me: Audrey, does the babysitter have chickens in her yard?

Audrey: No.

Me: Where are the chickens?

Audrey: They're in the fridge, Non.

Another example. Audrey came out of her room wearing a princess costume a few weeks ago.

Rick: Audrey, you look just like a real princess!

Audrey: I am a real princess Appa. All I need is a castle, a wolf and a bush for the wolf to hide in.

The stories go on. One funnier than the last. Simply precious.

I had a terrific and much needed visit from Nancy and Colleen. Since I don't have any friends here (I am not a loser!) it was a welcome holiday from my duties as Lauren's slave. However, this visit was not without what seems to be our usual car trouble. No, not the new Traverse. We only have the Traverse here so with one car it can be challenging. The girls and I decided to rent a car for the duration of their stay to make things easier on everyone. Monday afternoon we are enjoying the views on PCH driving home from the beach in the rental. Lo and behold, the brakes went OUT. Fortunately we were near Neptune's net, and honestly, if you have to break down somewhere this is the place. Called Avis who gave us the roadside assistance number. Called roadside assistance and they said it would be 4 hours to get out to us with another vehicle. WHAT? Not acceptable in any way, shape or form. The supervisor that I spoke with advised me to drive the car back to the rental agency near LAX if I wanted to get another car sooner. I asked if the call was being recorded, and it was, so when me and my two friends die because there are no breaks in this car, this recording will be available for the lawsuit, RIGHT? Surprisingly, there was no response. Ultimately, we had it towed and did not get another car. Rick came to pick us up and we did just fine with one care for the last two days. Note to self: Do not ever, under any circumstances, rent from Avis. Morons.

Lauren is doing well. She enjoyed a much needed trip to spend a week with Nathan. And Rick and I enjoyed the time she was away. First break we have had since July 18. From empty nesters and loving it to 24/7 care. Tough deal. Her doctor back at Rush did not give her the okay to start putting weight on her foot. He said he does not want her to do anything until he sees her when we come home for Thanksgiving. We all sort of expected that. And after everything Lauren has been through theses last 3 1/2 months, we do not want to rush things and have a setback. She is so done with the crutches and I can't blame her. Hopefully in a few weeks. Fingers crossed.

Expecting rain in SoCal tomorrow. If it does rain, it will be the second time since we moved here on September 9. Far cry from October in Chicago.