Talk About Getting "Slicked"

Yesterday I had to get new tires for the Escalade aka "Esplanade." I knew exactly what kind of tires I needed and called ahead to be sure they were in stock. Of course when I arrived at the tire store the guy that I spoke with on the phone was not there. Big surprise there. I went through the whole spiel again about what kind of tires I wanted etc. The sales guy then asks me if I want 4 tires. Who the hell buys only one?! Blah, blah, blah. He starts to ring me up when he asks, "Do you want your tires slicked?" I'm like, "What?" Again, "Do you want your tires slicked?" I'm still not sure that "slicked" was the word he used but whatever. I thought it meant wiping the outsides of the tires with Armorall for that shiny look. NOT. Apparently, slicking is a process in which they coat the treads of the tires with some spray on shit that makes for better traction. I told him I did not want this because "I drive an Escalade. Do you think traction is an issue for me? And If I'm buying new tires and the traction sucks, you can bet I will be right back in here tomorrow to see you, Ryan!" Have you ever heard of anything so ridiculous? I should have asked how much it was and how many idiots actually fall for this. Unbelievable.